SlimFast

Posted by Arcalyth on June 27, 2009, 6:31 a.m.

Hey! Do you wanna feel SOOOO SLIM?! Then try SlimFast! The weight-loss drink that will trim GRATUITOUS AMOUNTS OF FAT! With all new flavors like MELEE! Gigantic weight-loss. It's like adding weight loss to THE UNIVERSE! Sound the alarm, Melee is going to be UNCOMFORTABLY SLIM! What's that? You want lyposuction? Well how about lypoACTION! Made with calories. REAL CALORIES. Sports! *ahhhh!* You'll still suck at them! It's a weight-loss drink for fatties! Fatty-gy… These aren't your dad's puns, these are fatass puns! GIGANTOPUNS. Science! Weight-loss! Science! Weight-loss! Pie, Twinkies, Brownies, not enough snacks to fill the amount YOUR BODY HAS ROOM FOR! You'll be so slim Mother Nature will be like "I CAN SEE!" and you'll be like "fuck you!" and kick her in the face with your THUNDER THIGHS. You'll be so slim WEIGHT LOSS just eating ALL THE TIME! Fatty running, fatty eating, fatty sleeping, fatty cooking, fatty sitting, fatty wheezing, fatty spawning BABIES! You'll have NO babies! ZERO BABIES. If you had babies, give SlimFast to them and they won't be as fat as you! They'd be good at SPORTS! Make your babies run ABNORMALLY FAST. They'd run faster than MELEE! People would watch them running and know they're not MELEE! They'd race faster than MELEE! Against MELEE! The baby would win and Melee would lose A LIFETIME SUPPLY OF SLIMFAST. Hey! Go with the sure thing! Don't gamble with your weight-loss! SNAKE PIESSSSSSS….. Try SlimFast! The weight-loss drink that will make you AHHHH slim AHHHHHH

Comments

frenchcon1 14 years, 10 months ago

BEAR BLASTING

A SPORT YOU'LL INVENT BECAUSE YOU'LL BE TOO ENERGETIC FOR NORMAL SPORTS

Acid 14 years, 10 months ago

They see me trollin'! They hatin'!