I never really got into Pokemon Diamond/Pearl/Platinum… but because of the Thor, a DS style emulation handheld, I've been playing a lot more Platinum lately. That, and my recent list of things I keep myself busy with, has me listening to Pokemon Lofi. I must say, Gen 4 music slaps.

I've been working on just programming my Pokemon game. Like I did many years ago. In fact, the more I think about things, the more the stayed the same. This one is another Pokemon creepypasta. It may or may not be my last one. I don't know, but I don't have confidence in my art skills to design characters, maps, backgrounds, levels…. I'm good at copying though. Main downside is that I can't profit or sell any of these games I'm working on.

So I'm stuck in a loop. And part of me is starting to think this may not be a bad thing. I have been going through most of my life thinking that I just had to "grow up" and never look at child things again, like Pokemon or my dreams of game deving. But after doing so many years of so many adult things, I find comfort in things I know. Pokemon. Game Dev. Listening to music. Fawning over my crush, which has been my wife for so many years now. If I enjoy these things, what's the rush?

So, I'm going to keep working on solo dev-ing a Pokemon game. For a goal, sure, and for something to do. But mostly because this is where I found myself in life. And to me, that's beautiful.